This has to be some kind of record. It has been two months (give or take) since I last updated my handful of readers to the goings on of my not-so-remarkable life. It goes without saying that a lot has happened the past couple of months that left me in a somewhat sordid state, not the least of which was the theft of my phone. (I’d rather not talk about that in detail.) But, considering that I’m writing this in my alma mater (That I’ll discuss in detail in my next post.), I’m feeling good about things. (That won’t last.)
So. Let’s catch up.
The Current Affair.
The last few times I posted, I was writing about this girl who I called my Anti-Thesis. Yeah, she’s my girlfriend now. It was quite sudden, and it’s been a mixture o ecstatic and hellish most of the time, but as of this writing, we’re still together, and as far as I know, we still want to be.
We’ve been going through some stuff, and I foresee new and unpleasant shit coming, but, at least as I’m writing this, the relationship will soldier on. I mean, it has to. I’m 31. A long term relationship would be nice.
One of the reasons why I haven’t been blogging is that I’ve been busy. What with the weekly scripts as well as the work at the Think Tank (a job I’ve neglected for a week or two resulting in a financial clusterfuck), not to mention a new relationship, I have been more than a little preoccupied. It’s better than doing nothing, though, considering the circumstances.
The Big Man’s Latest Project.
As if the Think Tank and the TV writing gig weren’t enough, I went and added the Big Man’s latest project on my usually loaded plate of activities. It started out nicely enough, and I enjoyed shilling beauty products and being the mouthpiece of the group, but over the past couple of months, interest seems to have fizzled out from most people involved. I guess we’ll see how this turns out.
Sleepless Nights Once More.
Another one of the reasons why I haven’t blogged in so long is that what with the relationship troubles, the overworking, the theft, the lack of sleep and the already established mental issues, my problems with anxiety, depression, and all their friends have come back with a vengeance. Thing is, I’m in a far better place than I was back n 2009, but it’s as bad as it was back then. Worse, on certain days.
I feel over burdened and there’s no one I can share the weight with. Yes, I do have friends, some really good ones, but there isn’t a specific problem to take down here. The theft put the exclamation point on the whole thing. It highlighted my trust issues, my feelings of isolation, and reintroduced the sense of hopelessness that I thought I had expelled.
The difference between then and now is, after two months of dealing with everything, I’ve decided to change how I handled my issues. I’m tired of fighting and seeing as it’s never worked, I’ve decided to embrace it. All of it. The dark thoughts, the paranoia, the anxiety, the entire crazy person package.
So no, I’m not okay. Far from it. The exact opposite of, even. But this is how things are now, and as always, I will adapt and deal.
In light of all that, I’ve decided to start anew. Time for another reboot, so, starting with the next post, the chronicles of my personally overly romanticized life will be seen here.